Archives For Life and Death


My Poem of the Day

(08/29/14)

Your Hand

Feelings of regret

Wishing I had listened

That I had heard your cries

That I was there to hold your hand

In sickness and in health

Through thick and thin

I should have been there

But I let work get in the way

I couldn’t put my foot down

I didn’t demand the time off

And I slowly let you slip away

And now that you’re gone

I sit here alone in the darkness

No more work

Worse than that

No more you

Now left not knowing

Where to turn

What to do

My apologies fall on deaf ears

The only opinion that matters is yours

And you can no longer hear me

Life will never be the same

I feel I may go insane

If only I could find a way

To turn back the clock

And

Just hold your hand

Copyright 2014

Your Hand©

Felina Silver Robinson


The Darkness

When I close my eyes

There’s a darkness I don’t recognize

I’m afraid to keep my eyes closed

I’m afraid of what’s lurking in the shadows

I wonder if it’s a lost soul

I wonder if it hunts for me

I wonder if it will release me

A cold sweat comes over me

I scream and endless scream

I can’t open my mouth

But I can hear my own screams

No one else can hear me

No one else sees me

I’m trapped in this darkness

I try to run

But my legs wont move

I’m trapped inside myself

I hear footsteps

click clack across a tile floor

The warmth of a light

Suddenly against my face

A pair of cold hands remove the oxygen from my face

My eyes are uncovered

Again I’m able to see

The darkness is gone

I find myself laying upon a table

Covered in a hospital Johnnie

I suddenly realize

All was just hysterical fear

Fear of the darkness

Fear of the unknown

But now I know I’m back

Until next time

I’m under the knife

Just trying to find my way back

From the Darkness

Copyright 2014

The Darkness©

Felina Silver Robinson


This Doctor Thinks We May Achieve Immortality, But Isn’t Sure We’d Want To


My Poem of the Day

(08/24/14)

Without You Now

Without you now my days are always nights

My laughs become cries

My ups become downs

My smiles become frowns

I try to stop all that’s now upside down

You were the life in my step

The beat in my heart

The jump in my skip

You were the light in my life

Now I can’t seem to go on without you

It’s hard to imagine

But I know I must

So I trust you to help me find my way

To continue living on

Without you now

Copyright 2014

Without You Now©

Felina Silver Robinson


My Poem of the Day

(08/17/14)

A Wish for More Time

I haven’t seen you lately

But my thoughts are always with you

Each day that passes I wish there were more hours in the day

I wish there weren’t so many miles between us

I wish I had spent more time telling you all the things I’ve wanted to say

Now there is no chance for you to know all I had to share

I find myself wondering if you could have ever known

All that I felt for you

All the times I remember

All the days I was thankful to have you in my life

Thankful for all you had done

If I tell you now will you hear me

Will you forgive me for not telling you sooner

Will you watch over me

Will I get to see you again some day

Oh, how I wish I had more time to say all I wanted to say

And to hold you close again

Copyright 2014

A Wish for More Time©

Felina Silver Robinson


My Poem of the Day

(08/11/14)

A Final Goodbye

My depression held me prisoner

Alcohol soothed the pain

Alcohol became a problem

Those I love were more important

So drinking was forgotten

But depression still lingered about

Work kept me busy

I was definitely a lucky man

Still something was missing

I tried hard to push it out

But sometimes

No matter what you do

There are somethings that just never get worked out

So I chose my way out

I know I’ll leave you crying

I know you will be disappointed

But my pain was just too unbearable and I just wanted out

I chose to meet my maker

I’m sorry to leave you behind

But if I’m lucky

Someday we’ll meet again

And maybe just maybe

You’ll find a way to forgive me

Until then

I’ll spend my time healing

And begin to feel better

about who and what I am

Goodbye my love

Until we meet again


A Final Goodbye©

This Poem is Dedicated to the memory of Robin Williams

A Man that I will forever look up to. May he now find the happiness that was missing.


My Poem of the Day

From the Voice of Domestic Violence

(08/10/14)

Do You Know What You Mean to Me

I’m grateful that you brought me back from the darker side of life

I was stripped of who I once was

There was no rhyme and no reason

Just a man with power who was in control

He chased away all those who mattered to me

He cut me off from all I once enjoyed

No longer allowed to venture out alone

No phone calls not monitored by him

No trips to the bathroom

Calls at work being certain I was their

Check Ins required with every departure and arrival

I was trapped inside my own private hell

Bruised and beaten by a man claiming love

He said that he owned me

And would take what he wanted

When he wanted

There was no one to stop him

Everyone had gone

Everyone had scattered

Friends I thought I had

Couldn’t, just wouldn’t be bothered

Even knowing what he could do

to me and the children

I had to find freedom

From the monster I married

No one deserves to live in such fear

So when he left on his road trip for work

I changed the lock on the door

And

Sent him packing

No longer did I have to

see him, touch him, love him, be with him

You saved me

You gave me strength to stand up

And become who I once was again

I don’t have the words to tell you what that means to me

Without your care and compassion

I don’t know where or who I would be

You were there when no one else was

You knew without asking what I had been through

You passed no judgement

You just helped me get my life back

No I’m stronger than ever before

All I can do is say “Thank You”

And promise that you’ll never find me there again

Do you know what you mean to me?


Copyright 2014

Do You Know What You Mean To Me?©

From the Voice of Domestic Violence

Felina Silver Robinson