By Felina Silver Robinson
This morning I was sad to hear that Dr. Michael Davidson died yesterday at the hands of Stephen Pasceri, of Millbury because his mother, Marguerite Pasceri, died after Dr. Davidson had performed surgery on her. A childs love of a parent, especially a mother, can be as strong as an individual’s will to live. When you take that away from someone they often lose the will to go on, feeling as though they are invisible. Their reality is obviously tainted as was that of Stephen Pasceri. So when I sit down to dinner tonight I will again pray for both families and will hope that everyone can move past this traumatic incident without further loss. Life does go on for those who want to live it.
I start grateful that my twins made it to school today and we actually got all three girls out of the house early and quite happy. It’s the small things in life that actually matter. As I continue my morning chores, I think about the fact that people don’t seem to truly realize the value of their lives as well as the lives of others. It deeply saddens me that only in times of tragedy or in a convenient PR move or moment that they reach out to those suffering or in need of companionship. I further started to wonder why people need to be dying, or rich to meet someone they admire or look up to. I know some may think why is she spending her time thinking about such things? I do because it matters to me. Really, things that make others happy matter to me. I tell my own kids every day not to “waste time fighting about things that don’t matter or that you know won’t change, that life is short and the way they are behaving at the moment isn’t the way they are going to want to be remembered.” I always tell them that “they should put all their energy into being the best they can be as themselves and whether others like it or not, they will find themselves happy with what they have done. You can’t make yourself happy based on the desires of others.”
Chores are out-of-the-way for the time and I go onto exercise. 6,100 steps, thanks again to HBO and Boardwalk Empire, Season 5, Episode 2 this time. It’s truly amazing how the pain goes unnoticed when you don’t have to focus on it. I tell my children to focus on the happiest memory they can when they know they have to endure pain. It truly helps. I truly believe that people would be so much happier if they didn’t center their lives around the fact that they are in pain. No one can live like that. There is no fulfillment in that at all.
I finally remember to schedule a couple of much-needed appointments. I have a terrible habit of putting things of my own personal needs on hold because I’m obviously a caretaker to everyone else, leaving myself by the wayside. It’s my New Year’s resolution to try to do a better job of taking care of me, which is why I’m making a concerted effort to exercise more. I might be being a little hard on myself as I did just have knee surgery less than two months ago, and the injury was what kept me from exercising. However in my mind, that is no excuse and I have always lived off of the premise that there is no gain without a little pain. It’s hard to release yourself from childhood memories meant to guide you through life. What’s important, is that I’m on track now. I just hope that I can keep up the good work. I’m definitely motivated, that’s for sure.
Well, it’s time to prepare for a meeting, after which I can get to writing for another day. Until we meet again…Thanks for stopping by.