Archives For Collission
Life has continued to bring me a mix of good and bad. The good is a loving family who is healthy for the most part. The bad is hearing of loved ones lost.
Last night one of the worst things that could have ever happened to me happened. While checking on Facebook updates last night an old high school friend sent me a message saying that we needed to talk. I messaged her with my phone numbers and waited to hear back from her. I got off from Facebook and returned to spending time with my family. My husband was fast asleep as was the rest of the house when I returned to Facebook to see if my friend had sent any further information, she had not. So I started reading the status feeds. To my horror, I came across a message from my friend saying good-bye to our mutual friend who I had wished a happy birthday to after receiving a Facebook Alert for her birthday. I immediately broke out into hysterical tears at even just the idea of our friend being gone. I started to search the internet for her obituary. To my extreme horror I came across an article outlining the story of her murder. I was enraged! Angry because I was so happy to have talked to Tanya again after so many years of falling out of touch after my 30th birthday party. There was a small group of us that were close friends as we had all taken dance class together at Brookline High School. We remained in contact with one another through the years with some spots here and there. I had planned to come see Tanya back on November 1st, but there was some shooting that happened around her area and we decided to wait until things cooled down a little bit before taking our kids for a visit. We spoke a few more times before the holiday and to my disappointment fell out of touch, which is why I had no idea that she had passed. The most troubling for me is that we had spoken of the man accused of killing her. She left out some details in that she had taken this young man in off the street, which is something I had done. Tanya and I were a lot alike as was our other friends in the group. That’s what brought us together. We all connected on many levels. As I write this message, my stomach is turning with such anger and resentment for the man (John Devine of Marblehead) that took the life of my friend. I will be forever be left with the words from our last conversations where she spoke so lovingly of the man who beat her to death. My heart truly goes out to Tanya’s sister (Sabrina Joyce). I remember that Tanya’s parents (Leon and Doris (Mallouf) Nichols) had both already passed on. I’m only glad that they did not have seen or hear of their daughters torment and murder. Now at least they are reunited. Today’s lesson, don’t let time erase your memories nor the bonds of your friendships. Stay close to those who hold meaning in your life always letting them know that they matter. Once they are gone, it’s too late!
is will be well in just another day in the life of ME!© By Felina Silver Robinson
Quite some time has passed since last I found time to write to you. Life has its ways of running you instead of your running it. Today I have the urge to speak about relationships. In my life, I’ve had many friends, lots of acquaintances and of course we all have family. There are those we can trust and others that we can’t. No matter how much time we spend with people, no matter how many years pass the truth is we will never know all we could know about anyone in our lives. The things that draw us to one another initially can be the very thing that tears our relationship down later on. Secrets, disloyalty, lies, and abusive behavior whether it be verbal, physical or emotional are all the tools that each person to destroy their relationships. Each one of us have our breaking points for what we are willing to take or put up with. We are all told that compromising is a part of every successful relationship. This is most often true, however reality teaches all of us that there are many people out there that take advantage of compromising to the point where they no longer want to compromise and thus all of their relationships start to break down one by one.
Sometimes people are fighting within themselves holding on to the tragedies of their past. Not letting go of past events and not forgiving others for the pain they have caused you truly gets in the way of your being able to live your life the way you need to live it. I purposefully did not say “want to live it”, because the reality is, that we shouldn’t always base our lives off of what we want. It’s more important to look at what we need both from our lives as well as in our lives. I’m certain without the combination, you won’t end up happy. Everyone I know that has not processed through their tragedies no matter how major or minor has not been able to move forward in their lives. It hurts me deeply to see this. So many people I know rant their anger and frustration all over Facebook. I’m almost certain that if they were able to work through their feelings they wouldn’t be making destructive decisions that can ultimately damage their working career down the line or the relationships that they have with their peers.
Pain must be processed and not pushed aside. The results can be life altering. Why give into destruction when healing actually benefits you and everyone in your life? Speaking from experience, I can honestly say it’s definitely better to process the pain. You don’t forget the things that have happened. You just move on. But you can’t move on until you’ve done something with the pain.
Enough said. Time to prepare for a slumber party involving 6 teenage girls. All is well in just another day in the life of ME!© By Felina Silver Robinson